quently, he, too, was without parental supervision, but was watched over after school by his brother, Ken, who was about six years older than we.

Ken was an athletic kid; extremely well developed for his age he had the physique of a Greek god. He had built for himself a kind of gymnasium in one room of their house. and as both Billy, my friend, and I were rather underdeveloped, he frequently gave us a workout in the gym, trying to teach us wrestling and boxing in order to develop our bodies. He was a fine boy, full of life and laughter, and was extremely kind and tender to us kids. It was not difficult for me to develop a hero worship for him.

or

I soon grew extremely fond of Ken and greatly admired his body which was so much better developed than my own. I used to seek every opportunity to throw my arms around him and hug him, frequently kissing his side or chest before he could disentangle me, throw his arm over my shoulders and press me to his side. I loved to play at wrestling with him. We usually worked out in the gym with only our shorts on, sometimes even nude, and when I felt his naked flesh against mine I was thrilled immensely. Whenever we wrestled I would always let him. throw me, and then, before he could get up, I would relax and gently caress his back with my fingers as long as he would permit. That he obviously enjoyed this was proved by the fact that sometimes it took him quite a while to get up. This kind of play, which I now realize was essentially homosexual, went on for a long time, and many is the time he would suddenly pull himself from me, jump up and run to the bathroom and lock himself in for quite a while. Often I tried to follow him but he would never let me in. One afternoon when Ken was

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about sixteen or seventeen, Billy went off to play baseball with some other boys. Ken had said that he had to study and I had said that I had to go home. I started toward home, but as soon as the other boys were out of sight, I went back and slipped quietly into the house. I found Ken in his bedroom sitting at his desk, completely nude, and already studying. I stood in the doorway for a while without Ken's knowing I was there. Then I slipped up behind him, threw my arms around him and began kissing him on the neck. He was startled, of course, and asked what I was doing there. I said that I had come back because I wanted to be with him and begged him to let me stay, promising to be quiet and let him study. He started to put some clothes on but I begged him not to, and told him that I liked to see and admire him as he was. For a time I sat quietly on the bed and Ken quickly became so engrossed in his studies that he appeared to forget that I was there. Then I slipped my own clothes off, and I don't think he even knew it. Finally, I got

up

and slipped over to the bench on which he was sitting and sat down beside him. We sat there for about half an hour, during which I had begun to caress his spine with my fingers which I knew he enjoyed and which had frequently excited him when we were wrestling. I did not know then exactly what I was doing, but I did know that what I did seemed to give Ken pleasure and frequently produced a rather surprising effect. Finally, as he began to fidget, I threw my arms around him and buried my head in his lap, kissing him on the abdomen and thighs.

This did not take long to produce the usual effect, and he thrust me away, saying: "Now you've done it!" I asked what I had done and he said it was none of my business. I asked him if that was why he always ran

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